POT NOODLE REVIEW

WIN

Look at the picture, look at it closely. Observe its taut curved body, observe how it beckons seductively This is not just a pot noodle. This is a no7 spare rib pot noodle

The picture above is full of win. I will say that again slowly. THE PICTURE ABOVE IS FULL OF WIN. The only problem is that the receptacle is empty. I have ate it. The only way it would be more full of win was if it was full, but, again, I have ate it. It was bastard lovely. And then some. The Pot noodle shown is quite possibly a gift from the Great Divine. This is the first review of the blog and I am going to write about Spare Rib Pot Noodle.

Pot noodles are great and can be enjoyed in a variety of ways. From pouring them over a big plate of chips, to having them on toast with melted cheese to the standard way with 4-5 slices of bread. The pot noodle brand comes in a variety of flavours. |The horror curry flavour that tastes like a wet Burberry dog jacket jacket, Beef and tomato that is alright, just alright. The mighty Chicken and Mushroom that was the king of flavours and the delightful limited edition Xmas dinner flavour,

I thought nothing could beat the sublime splendour that chicken and Mushroom supplied. Every step in the process was a joy, from putting the kettle on, waiting breathlessly whilst it boiled. Every second the waters churned below the magical 100c was a mockery of your hunger. The long pregnant seconds as the water nudged ever closer to boiling, shall you pour it before it is boiled or shall you wait? AAAHHH the suspense!! then “DING” the water has boiled. The careful frenzy as you poured the waters in and added the golden sachet of soy sauce. Every drop a precious elixir of delight, your intense concentration as you squeezed the sachet between your thumb and forefinger to get Every. Last. Fucking. Drop. out. Stirring the magical potion and waiting for the noodles to soften in the stock. The process added to the joy of eating this wondrous, wondrous food. This has been eclipsed.

At Xmas I tried the Xmas dinner flavoured pot noodle. This was quite tasty and provided a quite splendid snack. Then today I tried the no7 Spare Rib flavour. Oh My Giddy Aunt. Over the years I have developed into a bit of a foody. I have ate stuffed river trout on the banks of Windermere, Rare veal at the savoy in London, Lobster Thermadour in a quite exceptional little Italian in Torquay and fresh lobsters on a trapping boat off the Cornish coast. All these above will stand the test of time and I will be thinking of them fondly as I wet the bed and bother the nurses with inappropriate erections in my nursing home but the pot noodle I had today was simply stunning. Every mouthful was a delight and joy and I deplore, nay, beg each and every one of you to go out, put your hands in your pockets and trying one of these magical snack. This is up there with some of the wonderful meals I have ate over the years and I will remember it to the day I go to the great ginger in the sky.

You will not be disappointed. Honest.